Always Glad To Help

An eight o'clock (a.m.) call from PhillyTwo is a bit out of the ordinary. It's usually a little later...when she's on her way to work. This morning there was a frantic tone.

PhillyTwo: "I think I'm gonna throw up!"
Me: "What's wrong?"
(Me thinking: "God, please don't let her be pregnant!")
PhillyTwo: "I was brushing my teeth and I felt something on my foot. I looked down and it was one of those giant cockroaches! Oh my God, it was huge!"
(Me thinking: "Whew! Better a cockroach than a baby!")
Me: "Oh no! What did you do?"
PhillyTwo: "I killed it! Luckily there was a pair of flip flops in the bathroom because I was barefoot. It ran up the wall and I picked up a flip and started hitting it over and over until it was smushed. I wanna throw up. That sucker was huge! I feel like bugs are crawling all over me now."
Me : "Yeah, there's never just one. There's probably thousands of them in your apartment."
PhillyTwo: "Thanks. That's exactly what I wanted to hear. I feel so much better now."
Me: "Still need to throw up?"
PhillyTwo: "More so. Bye."